The Day the Earth Stood Still

The fix is in, the die has been cast, the Democratic Vice Presidential Candidate has been chosen.

Many have wondered, many have guessed, many have spoken with authority.  But all were wrong.

Photobucket

Senator Barack Obama has chosen Klaatu as his running mate.  You may know Klaatu from the documentary cleverly disguised as a fictional movie titled "The Day the Earth Stood Still".

Klaatu will be accompanied by his robot friend Gort who is programmed to destroy the earth if we cannot control our violence.  Klaatu and Gort have been travelling to our planet for many years and beamed the script ahead of them into the mind of director Robert Wise, who created the documentary.  Asked about the striking resemblance between himself and Michael Rennie Klaatu replied, "That was just a fluke.  Everyone in outer space looks like Michael Rennie, I was surprised as anyone when he got the lead role."

Upon arriving on earth Klaatu was besieged by reporters but begged off any long interviews  saying he needed to sleep off four hundred light-years of jetlag.  He did share some observations with reporters, smiling ironically as he said such things as "it appears I wasn't a minute too late" and "I'll talk to you all after I get Gort's batteries topped up."

Senator Obama declined any extended interviews as well until after he can have extensive closed disussions with his running mate.  One reporter did overhear him saying to an aide something along the lines of "Georgia my ass", but that cannot be confirmed at this time.

This is Chris Blask reporting from the Washington Mall at the foot of the first interstellar craft to carry a US vice presidential candidate.



Display:


Re: The Day the Earth Stood Still (2.00 / 6)

Klaatu's from Venus, right?  He's constitutionally disqualified.


by rfahey22 on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 07:52:01 PM EST

His parents were stationed there, (2.00 / 3)

 so it's OK.


Motley Moose: Progress Through Politics
by chrisblask on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 07:56:44 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: His parents were stationed there, (2.00 / 6)

WHERE'S HIS BIRTH CERTIFICATE??!!?


by rfahey22 on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 07:57:42 PM EST
[ Parent ]

I hear that some anonymous (2.00 / 7)

anti-forgery expert has taken a look at it and determined that is is not really a birth certificate at all, but a note scribbled on a page from a book called "To Serve Man", so obviously he's benevolent at any rate...


Motley Moose: Progress Through Politics
by chrisblask on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 08:16:28 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: I hear that some anonymous (2.00 / 3)

I think SoVenus Darlin' has the inside scoop, myself.


by rfahey22 on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 08:20:04 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: I hear that some anonymous (2.00 / 2)

LOL, and one of my favorite TZ episodes:p


by Roberta on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 08:46:04 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Mojo for paying attention ;~) (2.00 / 2)


Motley Moose: Progress Through Politics
by chrisblask on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 10:37:18 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: I hear that some anonymous (none / 0)

"To serve man...

It's a cook book!!!!"

Love that episode, from a famous short story I think.....


On Nov 4th, we elected "the smart guy" and the world celebrated!
by WashStateBlue on Fri Aug 22, 2008 at 11:21:21 AM EST
[ Parent ]

Gustatus Similis Pullus... (2.00 / 1)

http://www.nytimes.com/slideshow/2008/03 /31/science/0401-PATCH_2.html


by CanuckinMA on Fri Aug 22, 2008 at 10:29:14 AM EST
[ Parent ]

Is this snark? (2.00 / 3)

Serious question.


Motley Moose: Progress Through Politics
by chrisblask on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 07:56:10 PM EST

Re: Is this snark? (none / 0)

Brilliant Chris!

Just fucking brilliant!

In my presence, you will forevermore never buy your own alcohol.


"Can We Build It? Yes We Can!" - Bob the Builder
by Stipes on Fri Aug 22, 2008 at 12:00:06 AM EST
[ Parent ]

I heard Klatuus posted on No Quarter today: (2.00 / 7)

"It is no concern of ours how you run your own website, but if you threaten to extend your violence, this website of yours will be reduced to a burned-out cinder. Your choice is simple: join us and live in peace, or pursue your present course and face obliteration. We shall be waiting for your answer. The decision rests with you."

Gort! Klaatu barada nikto!


On Nov 4th, we elected "the smart guy" and the world celebrated!
by WashStateBlue on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 07:59:41 PM EST

WE'RE ALL DOOMED! (2.00 / 7)

OBAMA JUST LOST THE ELECTION!!!1!!11

HOW COULD HE NOT CHOOSE GORT? WE NEED GORT FOR PARTY UNITY!


by TCQuad on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 08:03:28 PM EST

Re: WE'RE ALL DOOMED! (2.00 / 3)

We've lost the world-Destroying Robot vote...


Motley Moose: Progress Through Politics
by chrisblask on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 08:09:45 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: WE'RE ALL DOOMED! (2.00 / 4)

More importantly, you've lost the logistical support of the World-Destroying Robot PAC.

That group is integral to party unity, mostly because they intimidate (and, if necessary, destroy) people who want to disrupt the party.


by TCQuad on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 08:12:24 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: WE'RE ALL DOOMED! (2.00 / 2)

We need one of those...


It profits a PUMA nothing to give their soul for the whole world... but for McCain? --Sir Thomas More (if he were here now)
by LordMike on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 11:39:30 PM EST
[ Parent ]

no idea what this means.... (2.00 / 3)

so - rec'd.


"Democracy! Bah! When I hear that I reach for my feather Boa!" Allen Ginsberg
by canadian gal on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 08:06:27 PM EST

You just so need to watch the (2.00 / 3)

CLASSICS

And, no, you can't watch the 2008 remake.


Motley Moose: Progress Through Politics
by chrisblask on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 08:13:14 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: You just so need to watch the (2.00 / 1)

That remake looks absolutely AWFUL!!!


It profits a PUMA nothing to give their soul for the whole world... but for McCain? --Sir Thomas More (if he were here now)
by LordMike on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 09:34:21 PM EST
[ Parent ]

I think I threw up a little in my throat... (2.00 / 1)


Motley Moose: Progress Through Politics
by chrisblask on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 10:35:49 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: I think I threw up a little in my throat... (2.00 / 1)

Oh come on. It has Keanu, what could possibly go wrong?


by Cincinnatus on Fri Aug 22, 2008 at 10:32:24 AM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: You just so need to watch the (none / 0)

I'd like to get my hands on the guy who thought remaking this classice with Keaanu Reeves was a good idea!


"You might well think that. I couldn't possibly comment"
by xenontab on Fri Aug 22, 2008 at 02:25:56 AM EST
[ Parent ]

Probably the same idiot who cast (none / 0)

Nicolas "see how serious I am" Cage in that abortive remake of Gone is Sixty Seconds.  What a piece of crap.


Motley Moose: Progress Through Politics
by chrisblask on Fri Aug 22, 2008 at 08:40:11 AM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: no idea what this means.... (2.00 / 4)

Old, old American movie.  It didn't make any money and was widely panned at the time of release, but is now considered a classic with a non-nuclear proliferation message.


by rfahey22 on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 08:21:11 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: no idea what this means.... (2.00 / 4)

Yep, bring the popcorn, settle in and enjoy.


Motley Moose: Progress Through Politics
by chrisblask on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 08:27:24 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Recommended... (2.00 / 4)

Just for the classic Bernard Hermann soundtrack, if nothing else.

(And, please, if there is a God up there, please Lord, don't let them do a remake without the original Bernard Hermann music.  I'll burst a brain hemorrhage if they use some new shitty John Williams soundtrack.)


by Dumbo on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 08:43:08 PM EST

Re: Recommended... (2.00 / 3)

Props for the prolific use of the theremin!


It profits a PUMA nothing to give their soul for the whole world... but for McCain? --Sir Thomas More (if he were here now)
by LordMike on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 09:36:41 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Just look away, (2.00 / 2)

there's nothing to see, there.

(they fucking colorized Miracle on 34th Street, Hollywood has no shame)


Motley Moose: Progress Through Politics
by chrisblask on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 10:41:23 PM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: The Day the Earth Stood Still (2.00 / 3)

but, but, but he's SILVER!


Faced with the choice between changing one's mind and proving that there is no need to do so, almost everyone gets busy on the proof.
by jsfox on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 09:48:19 PM EST

Re: The Day the Earth Stood Still (2.00 / 1)

Hard-working Americans will never vote for a silver candidate.


by Cincinnatus on Fri Aug 22, 2008 at 10:33:21 AM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: The Day the Earth Stood Still (2.00 / 1)

Well, maybe the bad guy on last week's episode of The Invaders, but aren't ther aliens who look like Ray Walston, Robin Williams and John Lithgow?
Speaking of Lithgow, will Klaatu and Gort do a populist campaign in a 1962 Rambler American convertable?
by spirowasright on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 10:46:56 PM EST

Re: The Day the Earth Stood Still (2.00 / 1)

Chris -  You are my hero!  Nothing can top this...ever!


"Can We Build It? Yes We Can!" - Bob the Builder
by Stipes on Thu Aug 21, 2008 at 11:41:27 PM EST

Re: The Day the Earth Stood Still (2.00 / 1)

It may have been a one-off caused by fever delirium.  I only partially remember writing it...


Motley Moose: Progress Through Politics
by chrisblask on Fri Aug 22, 2008 at 08:29:01 AM EST
[ Parent ]

Re: The Day the Earth Stood Still (none / 0)

Dude, You must of tapped into something deep.  Can we keep you in a low grade fever for a while?  Just until early September, or so?


"Can We Build It? Yes We Can!" - Bob the Builder
by Stipes on Fri Aug 22, 2008 at 10:10:12 AM EST
[ Parent ]

But, the VP can't be THE ONE! (2.00 / 4)

Real TDTESS fans of course, know about "the Christ" controversy....

From the Wicki:

Some have claimed that Christian allegory is woven throughout the film. Allusions to the story of Jesus Christ can be seen as a means of supporting Klaatu's character and his message of peace:[4] Klaatu, upon arriving on Earth, uses a semi-biblical name, argues his points in front of the establishment, escapes the government after disagreeing with them and prefers to stay with common people. In the New Testament, Jesus Christ is sometimes called the "carpenter's [Joseph's] son", and like Jesus, Klaatu adopts the Earthly name "John Carpenter". Klaatu lecturing Professor Barnhardt (played by Jewish actor Sam Jaffe with Einstein's hairdo) on his own blackboard subject, is a parallel to the young Jesus lecturing the rabbis in the temple. Klaatu's death at the hands of soldiers echoes the death of Jesus; just as Jesus' crucifixion was carried out by soldiers, so also is Klaatu's killing. Jesus is removed from a sealed tomb by the angel, and Gort removes the body of Klaatu from a locked jail cell. Klaatu's friend Helen plays the part of Mary, questioning what is happening. Like the resurrection of Jesus, Klaatu is revived from the dead for a short time by the robotic Gort.[5] Klaatu gives his climactic speech and then departs Earth in his spaceship; in Biblical accounts of Jesus' life, he gave a final address to his disciples before ascending into heaven (New Testament, Acts Chapter 1). [4][5]

The contemporary rendering of the Christ story was deliberately written into the film by screenwriter Edmund North: "It was my private little joke. I never discussed this angle with Blaustein or Wise because I didn't want it expressed. I had originally hoped that the Christ comparison would be subliminal."[6] In a 1995 interview, producer Julian Blaustein explained that the studio censors balked at the portrayal of Klaatu's resurrection and limitless power. At their behest, a line was inserted into the film: When Helen asks Klaatu if Gort has unlimited power over life and death, Klaatu explains that he has only been revived temporarily by advanced medical science and states that the power of resurrection is "reserved to the Almighty Spirit."[2][7]


On Nov 4th, we elected "the smart guy" and the world celebrated!
by WashStateBlue on Fri Aug 22, 2008 at 12:45:42 AM EST


You are not logged in.

In order to post a comment, you must be logged in. If you have a member account, please log in to comment.

If not, you can make an account right here. It's quick and free.